VO: It's the nation's favorite antiques experts, with £200 each, a classic car and a goal to scour Britain for antiques.

That hurts.

I'm gonna go for it, Joe.

VO: The aim?

To make the biggest profit at auction, but it's no mean feat.

There'll be worthy winners and valiant losers.

Goodness gracious me!

VO: So will it be the high road to glory or the slow road to disaster?

Not nice to gloat.

There we are.

VO: This is the Antiques Road Trip!

Yeah!

We're back on the road in the sunny south of England with two cheerful experts - Charlie Ross and Catherine Southon.

CHARLIE (CR): I don't want to win the competition, Ms Southon, I just want to make you happy.

VO: Ha!

Catherine is an expert in scientific instruments and the dark art of hypnosis - when it comes to getting the price she wants to pay, that is.

DEALER: 140.

VO: Look at this.

CATHERINE (CS): 130.

130.

I'm gonna go for it, Jo.

VO: Charlie is an auctioneering supremo, especially when it comes to vintage cars - and the odd bottle of ale.

The last one I bought was 5p, I don't know if this is 4p or 6p?

VO: Ha-ha!

Our enthusiastic experts begin the trip with £200 each, but three auctions later, they still both have less than they started with.

VO: Charlie's meager total has slipped further - he starts this leg with a measly £101.98.

Catherine's faring slightly better despite having dropped a few of her £105 bricks - she only has £172.20 left to spend this time.

But they have each other and the sunshine, which is a bonus considering their cute little 1966 Austin Healey Frogeye Sprite is entirely roofless.

VO: This week, the road trip spirits us eastwards along the south coast of England, starting in Corsham, Wiltshire, and finishing in Rye, East Sussex.

Today we're starting our journey in Lewes, East Sussex, then heading north via Kent, culminating in an auction in Chiswick, west London.

How lovely.

VO: Both experts have struggled to make a reasonable profit so far.

But wouldn't it be lovely today if we both bought some items and then they just really did us proud at auction?

CR: In my case, it would be a miracle!

VO: Have faith Charlie - you never know!

Now, artist and designer William Morris wrote, "You can see Lewes lying like a box of toys "under a great amphitheater of chalk hill," and indeed this town is stuffed full of antique goodies just aching for a buyer.

CS: Antiques center!

VO: It's a shame our experts don't have much cash left.

CR: Could you tell me what to buy?

VO: Still, it's shopping time and we're on Catherine's home turf here.

This is your sort of place, isn't it?

It is, this is my comfort zone.

VO: First stop: Emporium Antiques - four floors of furniture, all manner of lovely collectables, and dealers whom Catherine knows well, this being her patch.

CS: Hello Michele.

DEALER: How are you?

CS: I'm good thank you.

CR: Are you gonna introduce us?

Yes, I'm sorry.

Charlie, Michele, Michele, Charlie.

Hello, nice to see you.

Well, have a look around, and we'll see... CR: I will.

CS: ..what we can see, is that alright, Michele?

I think you need to go down the back.

Why?

Because it's the more sort of cheaper area.

VO: Oh!

But knowing your way around is one thing.

Finding something you can afford is another.

Oh, everything I like is too much money.

I think sort of small, decorative... Oh, the pressure, the pressure.

What have I found?

Close your eyes.

Open them.

It's the Whitbread Silver Jubilee ale.

How many bottles of this must they make?

I buy this on every trip.

Now, the first one cost 5p and made £12.

The second one cost £2 and sold for... £2.

This one is £4... ..and would probably sell for £2.

Perhaps it's time to give up.

On the other hand, it might make £12.

VO: Oh Charlie, when will you ever learn?

Michele, I have a track record on tour of always buying a bottle of Jubilee commemorative beer.

Oh, OK. Now, it's over there, and it's got £4 on it, but I don't know... That can be £3, as it's you.

Deal!

I'm definitely having the beer because that will keep my trend going.

VO: One purchase down for Charlie.

Now what's this Catherine's found?

It's just a paperweight, Kosta Boda.

It's quite nice though.

Michele, what's Kosta Boda?

Scandinavian, I think it was Danish.

Danish.

If we say Scandinavian.

VO: Ah, let me enlighten you.

Kosta Boda is actually a Swedish glassworks.

It was formed back in 1742 but it was in the 20th century that it really came into its own with its stylish, artistic and functional designs.

This swimming hippo has £65 on the ticket.

How much could that be?

65, there'll be 55.

Oh, Michele.

Can it be 30?

I don't think so...

I don't think... Shall I ask Steve?

Yeah, ask Steve.

I'm gonna schmooze.

There's no way you could do 35 on it?

I could speak to him.

VO: Steve phones the dealer.

..get it for £35, I'd stand a bit of chance with it.

What did he say, Steve?

40 quid.

Huh?

40.

Oh.

I'm gonna hold that as a sort of possibility.

Hang on to it, have a think.

VO: That's one to think about.

I want to buy silver, that's the only thing that's doing well for me at the moment.

Silver, silver, silver.

VO: Ah - a cabinet stuffed with... silver.

CS: Steve?

Yeah?

Can I just have a look in this cabinet?

It's almost like a miniature claret jug.

Claret jug, isn't it?

I'm not sure what you'd use it for now, though.

VO: Er, claret?

1894.

Gibson & Langman, cut glass and then silver mounted.

Pretty handle though.

What would he take then, off that?

What's he got, 65?

Yeah.

60 quid at a push, maybe, but... VO: Catherine's not getting the discounts she was hoping for.

But maybe Steve can come to the rescue.

I tell you what, have a look at this.

It's not dear, but it might not be enough money for you that you want to spend.

Rubens' Angels, no holes, no cheese grater.

It's in good nick.

CS: It's molded isn't it, hobnail molded.

Just a glass dressing table jar.

STEVE: But the angels will always... CS: The angels are good.

34.

Could do it for 25.

These little dressing table jars are really 10 a penny.

This is slightly different.

It's got angels on the top.

Rubens' Angels, after the artist.

Hallmarked there for Birmingham.

I'm still tempted by this because I think it's such an elegant, beautiful shape.

VO: Time to phone the dealer.

Barry, it's Steve at the Emporium.

You've got a little sort of posh bottle.

What's the very best you'll do on it?

Don't say posh!

If he says "posh", he's not going to give it to me for a reduced price, is he?

STEVE: Cheers mate, bye now.

CS: What did he say?

STEVE: Say 55.

Did he?

No, he didn't, but say 55.

Oh, right.

Really?

VO: You know what they say - it's not what you know...

I mean, I think the two together, 80 quid is...

They're two fairly decent things, I think they're both salable.

CS: And the hippo was 35.

VO: Well actually it was £40 the last time I heard.

Yeah, can be 35.

Yeah?

OK. 25.

Mm-hm.

CS: 55.

STEVE: 55.

..makes 80.

STEVE: Hungry hippo.

115.

110 and we're done.

We don't do with fives, do we?

Go on, 110, 110.

OK. That's good, yeah.

CS: That's good, I've got a little mixture.

There we are, my dear.

20.

VO: Smooth operator, Miss Southon!

Charlie's notionally spent three whole pounds on a bottle of ale so far.

But now something else has caught his eye - an art-deco lady's traveling clock.

CS: I looked at that, I like that.

Oh, that's not bad.

Oh, please don't buy it, cuz I found that.

If you buy that, and if that makes money, I'm gonna be very upset.

You are really making me want to buy this, aren't you?

He said.

Right!

I don't know whether that can be within my budget.

It's not going to have to come down a huge amount, but I love that.

It has got...

Pretty.

..a little nick out of the enamel there, which is a shame, but it's a really pretty enamel clock... STEVE: Pretty little thing.

CR: It is a very pretty clock.

It's got 115.

I've got, I think, 101 quid or something.

So I haven't got to beg it...

So the normal trade could be about 100 quid.

Yeah, quite.

But I'm sure we could do a bit better than that.

I would expect that.

I don't know, I mean...

If whoever owns that could take 80 quid, I would buy it straightaway.

I'll give him a ring.

Yeah, thank you very much indeed, Steven.

Best price on the clock?

Yeah, sure.

OK. Ah.

What's the verdict?

£80, sir.

CR: Really?

STEVE: He'd like more.

VO: That is a great chunk out of your budget Charlie, you brave, or foolish, fellow.

CR: Proper antique.

Unusual for Ross, but...

If we can't make something on that, then for the fourth time on this tour, I give up.

Steven, thank you very much indeed, I owe you 80 quid.

You probably don't also know, I owe you three quid as well.

STEVE: Three quid?

CR: Yes.

STEVE: Take your word for it.

CR: I bought a bottle of beer.

STEVE: Bottle of beer.

CR: 20, 40... VO: So just to recap, Charlie's spent £83 on yet another bottle of ale and an art-deco traveling clock, while Catherine's parted with £110 for her hippo, a glass jug and a silver topped jar.

Which means Charlie's late.

Come on!

How long have you been sitting there?

About five hours.

How long do you take...?

VO: Nag, nag, nag.

All this pitiful "I've got no money"!

VO: Nag, nag, nag.

CR: Put it on the accelerator.

VO: Charlie and Catherine are leaving Lewes behind, heading 10 miles south to Seaford.

This seaside town sits at the base of Seaford Head, at the east end of the South Downs.

In the Middle Ages, Seaford was one of southern England's main ports, persistently raided by French pirates.

Ooh la la.

Now all the residents need to worry about are a couple of new invaders - well, Catherine anyway.

Charlie's dropping her off so she can do a spot of shopping.

CS: Bye-bye.

CR: Mwah!

See you later, have fun at your visit.

Have a lovely shop.

Arrivederci!

VO: Oh.

With just over £62 left in her pocket, it's time to explore Seaford's wares - and it's not long before Catherine spots something she really likes the look of in Mark's Antiques.

Question is, can she afford it?

Best to ask the shop's owner - yep, it's Mark.

I'm Mark.

Hello, Mark, hi.

Something caught my eye in your window.

I was just walking past, I think you're mainly jewelry, are you, yeah?

No.

Oh no, you do a bit of everything.

Everything, many things.

Ah!

Well what I saw in the window was a beautiful cloisonne enamel little pot.

Certainly.

Is it expensive, before you go to the trouble of opening...

It is expensive.

How expensive is it?

Very best on it would be... £650.

Have I got that sort of money?

VO: Er, no!

Do you have things under £100?

There are quite a few other nice silver items in the cabinet.

Shall I go and have a look in the cabinet?

MARK: Do.

CS: Are you flexible, Mark?

I'm always flexible.

Are you?

Ah, that's my man, that's my guy.

OK, I'm gonna open this up.

My eye's instantly drawn to the cocktail sticks.

The enamel is not crisp.

Can you see that here?

The colors sort of slightly run into one another.

Sterling silver cocktail sticks, terminating in a little, a little cock, figure of a cock, but I'm not sure that they're really crisp enough.

Mark, from a distance, I love these.

MARK: Yep.

CS: But when you get up close... ..the enamel's not great on them, is it?

I do like them, but there's also a borderline between naively painted and... not so skillfully painted.

True.

How much are they?

I didn't even ask you, how much are they?

How much are they, or how much can you have them for?

How much could I have them for?

I like the way there's a real differentiation between those two.

OK. Those... ..you could have for £45.

45.

How much did you have on them, then?

£60.

Right.

Would you do 40 on those, Mark?

I couldn't, no.

Could you not?

MARK: No.

VO: Here we go Catherine's technique of repeating the price she wants to pay.

Oh.

You sure you don't want to do 40?

I cannot do 40, no.

I think I'd have them for 40, but not 45.

I know that's not a big difference, but it is when you're trying to win against Charlie Ross and try and make a profit.

(DRUMROLL) OK, £40.

Can I?

Yeah.

It's a deal.

You're a lovely man.

VO: Flattery will get you everywhere.

Well, with her shopping done today, Catherine can put her feet up.

Charlie, meanwhile, is on his way to somewhere quite otherworldly.

He's skimming 17 miles eastwards to Hailsham, East Sussex.

Deep in the Sussex countryside lies the astonishing sight of the Observatory Science Centre.

Showing Charlie around is science director Dr Sandra Voss.

Wonderful.

It looked stunning coming up the drive across the fields.

Yep, it is.

Now, starting at the very beginning, it is the royal observatory, commissioned by... SANDRA: King Charles II.

1675.

There was an awful lot of ships being lost at sea, so they wanted to get a really good star catalog.

So he said, "We do need somebody to make a good star catalog, "but we need an observatory for that."

VO: Initially, the observatory was built in Greenwich, but was later moved here in 1947, because the London smog was hampering visibility.

So they had to reconstruct all of the...

They did have to reconstruct them, without plans or anything.

CR: Hadn't they got any plans?

SANDRA: No, they had pictures and postcards, and a chap who knew what he was doing!

Now, are we allowed to go into one of these domes?

I think so.

Would you like to go into SANDRA: this one here?

CR: Please, I'd love to.

So come into our smallest dome, and this one... ..is the 13 inch astrographic refracting telescope.

My first reaction is, it looks like a gun off a battleship.

SANDRA: (CHUCKLES) CR: It's extraordinary.

SANDRA: Battleship gray.

Battleship gray, and of course all this was owned by the Royal Navy.

Owned by the Admiralty, so everything was battleship gray.

And this was built when?

It was built in 1890.

It was commissioned for a project called the Carte du Ciel, which was involved with about 17 other observatories.

CR: Yeah.

SANDRA: Making a...

BOTH: Map of the sky.

SANDRA: Exactly.

VO: Back in 1890, this telescope was cutting edge technology... ..made by British manufacturers.

CR: You look through there?

Yeah, you do.

I can switch this one on if you like.

What?!

We take the brakes off.

And then we can come and move it.

Would you like to come and have a try?

How phenomenal.

Oh I see, you just peep through there.

Yes, there's two telescopes.

Yeah.

But I can't see anything, can I?

Can we do something with the roof?

We could do something with the roof, yes.

Oh my goodness!

This is James Bond!

This is extraordinary!

This telescope tracks perfectly opposite the Earth's rotation, so it perfectly tracks what you're looking at.

What a feat of engineering and science that is.

And still working perfectly well today.

Oh, it's beautiful, yeah.

Am I allowed to spin it round and look at the sky?

You can spin it round, just press this button there and see what happens.

(WHIRRING) CR: Oh my God.

SANDRA: Hang on!

Oh no, we're mov... Oh no, we're not.

I need to look at the floor, otherwise I'm going to fall over.

You're full of tricks, aren't you?

VO: This amazing dome can rotate 360 degrees, so the telescope can look at any area of the sky.

You can let go, yeah, yeah.

There you go.

Stop!

SANDRA: That's it.

CR: Perfect.

I'm good at this.

SANDRA: Perfect.

That really was quite an experience.

I'm going to come back here when it's dark.

Yes.

And we move on to another dome?

Yeah, I think.

Come on.

VO: The domes were built from copper, because when it weathers it turns green, so blending into this beautiful countryside - and each one houses telescopes capable of different magnifications.

CR: (LAUGHS) It's like a space rocket!

SANDRA: It's absolutely beautiful.

The other telescope is a... bit of machinery.

It sort of talks to you.

It's got something to do with that counterbalance weight being round, as opposed to the other one being square.

Yes.

This is the Thompson 26 inch refracting telescope.

But again, there's the two telescopes on this on, with the guidescope on top.

Can you see that?

The guide one just to get the clue as to roughly where you are in the sky.

The guidescope itself was built in 1860, and that was really significant in Greenwich.

It was called the Great Equatorial telescope, and it was the biggest telescope they had at the time.

It must be a very tall man to have a look there.

We have to do something a little bit different in this one, to make it safe and comfortable to actually look through the telescope.

Just press this button.

And we're away.

Oh my goodness, what's happening?

We're on a rising floor.

Are we going up, or is the machine going down?

SANDRA: We're going up.

VO: Telescope technology has left these astonishing machines behind and found more suitable locations.

Nowadays the world's most powerful telescopes sit on the top of mountains and extinct volcanos, where astronomers have much longer - and clearer - viewing times.

It's a really uncanny thought to think that you can move tons and tons... how many tons?

SANDRA: 12 tons.

CR: 12 tons?

SANDRA: 12 tons.

CR: ..like that.

Yes.

It's beautifully balanced, it's just absolutely beautifully balanced.

VO: The observatory is open to the public - but for Charlie, his visit has now sadly come to an end.

He has another hard day's shopping ahead.

So sleep tight, dear experts!

VO: Day two, and getting into focus, our dueling duo are raring for another day's spend, spend, spend.

There's an antique shop.

CR: Good morning.

WOMAN: Morning!

CR: How are you?

WOMAN: I'm fine, you?

CR: Lovely to see you.

Oh, I'm going there.

Yes!

CS: Charlie...!

CR: Roscoe, you are on fire!

You are so shallow, you are... VO: Charlie and Catherine have left East Sussex in the dust, and are heading for Sevenoaks in Kent.

So far, Charlie has spent exactly £83 on an art-deco traveling clock and a bottle of silver jubilee ale.

That leaves him with a trifling £18.98 to knock about with.

Catherine on the other hand has spent £150 on four items - a Victorian carafe, a silver topped jar, a set of cocktail sticks and a crystal hippo - as you do - and now has a mud wallowing £22.20 left in her coffers.

But a lack of money isn't going to stop our experts in their antiques quest.

CR: I don't think I'll be in the fine furniture row, do you?

CS: No, I'm not sure you'll be in the antiques section, either!

Is there a bric-a-brac section, do you think?

Just for me.

Wonderful, perfect.

Going to be out of my price range.

Have a lovely day.

Mwah.

Enjoy your shopping.

I will.

How much is it you've got?

£17?

Get on with it.

VO: Actually he's got £18.98.

This shop is bursting with gorgeous antiques and a large restoration workshop.

It's run by former butcher Eddie.

Nice to see you, Eddie.

Now, I'm in a pathetic position, and I'll come clean with you.

I'd love to buy all your lovely furniture.

I started my week with a couple of hundred quid, and it's been going steadily down ever since.

But I bought something for 80 quid yesterday, so I've got a pathetic amount of money to spend.

May I have a look round?

Please do.

And I'll give you a call if I can find something.

EDDIE: Yeah, certainly.

CR: Thank you.

VO: Yes Charlie, you could do with putting some meat onto your bony budget, so is there anything here you can actually afford?

That's very Chiswick.

Very rustic.

A salting trough.

Rough hewn.

Look at these cut chisel marks, just literally made out of a chunk of wood.

VO: Before the days of refrigeration, salt was commonly used to preserve meat.

Sides of meat would have been rubbed with salt and then laid in troughs like this one, drying them out and thereby providing food for the winter months.

Would look wonderful on a big dining table with bananas and oranges and any manner of fruit and grapes.

Won't be in my price range, of course.

But it's £46.

And what have I got?

I've written it down on the back of my hand so that I don't forget.

£17.98.

VO: Charlie - your maths really is appalling.

You have £18.98, I'm pleased to tell you.

What would you salt in there, a bit of pork?

Yeah, a bit of pork.

Yeah.

That's not elm, is it?

Beech, will it be beech?

Oh, perhaps it's beechwood.

Yes, yes.

I mean, it's got all the elements that I like to see.

A few wormholes.

Yes.

I love to see a few wormholes.

That's right, yeah.

It gives it a bit of flavor.

CR: Yeah!

(THEY CHUCKLE) Yeah, I'm not sure it's a flavor you want.

Do you want to know what I've got left in my kitty?

If you must.

I've got about 15 quid left, and it's got £46 on it.

£46.

Is it yours?

I mean presumably it's yours?

It belongs to one of the ladies that's got a pine shop in here.

EDDIE: She does the pines.

CR: Oh does it?

EDDIE: One of the dealers.

CR: Is she lovely?

She's lovely, yeah.

I could ring her and ask her.

Well, nothing ventured, nothing gained.

Off you go.

EDDIE: OK. CR: I'm gonna sit here and pray.

CR: Do your best, Eddie.

EDDIE: OK. VO: Eddie tries the dealer but gets her answerphone instead.

Would you like me to go ahead with it?

I'll speak to you later.

OK.

Thank you, bye-bye.

I'm not sure whether you're looking happy or sad, really.

What's the verdict?

I haven't spoken to her, I couldn't get through to her, actually.

But I think I could do the deal with you anyway.

CR: Are you sure?

EDDIE: Yeah, sure.

You haven't made a mis-STEAK?

VO: Oh no!

Are you sure with that?

Yeah, that's fine, that's fine.

CR: My lifelong savings.

VO: Well, while Charlie makes his way to his next shop with £3.98 - ha!

- Catherine's traveling nine miles north to the village of Downe.

She's coming to visit the former house of one of the most famous naturalists the world has ever known.

This is Charles Darwin's family home - and showing Catherine around is Julie Patenaude of English Heritage.

Wow!

This is Darwin's study where he spent most of his 40 years essentially, working on his book.

So this is where he wrote Origins Of The Species?

JULIE: It is.

VO: In 1859, Charles Darwin published a book that was to rock the world.

The Origin Of Species set out his theory that populations evolved over a number of generations through a process of natural selection going against the dominant - and his wife's - Christian beliefs.

JULIE: He used to sit on that chair, and he used the board and the papers to write.

I like especially the way that he's organized his books.

He spent five years on the Beagle on his trip, and because space was so condensed, he had to kind of develop a way to organize and file all his things.

VO: Six years after he returned from his round the world voyage on the Beagle, Charles Darwin settled here in Down House.

JULIE: He moved here in 1842 with his wife, Emma.

They had two kids and she was pregnant with their third.

CS: How many children did he have?

In all they had 10 children.

Really?

But three of them passed away.

Oh, good grief.

Tell me a bit about Emma, his wife.

JULIE: Emma was basically running the house, she taught the children when they were younger.

Darwin didn't think that girls needed to learn math or science, so... Really?

That's interesting.

Well, I mean it's, you know, it's the times.

He was a very loving father, not a very typical Victorian parent.

And he didn't mind them coming in and playing games, and... CS: I think that's wonderful.

I feel very privileged to be standing in here, in the room where he wrote Origin Of Species.

VO: With seven children knocking about, the Darwins needed a large living room.

JULIE: Yeah, it's the family room, it's the drawing room.

It's where everything basically happened that isn't Darwin's work.

Emma would sit at her piano, she loved to play.

CS: Was she a musician?

JULIE: She was.

Apparently she took lessons from Chopin.

Oh.

She would play to amuse herself, essentially, but also to please and let Darwin relax a bit.

She also loved to read to him as well.

Emma was a big fan of Dickens and Sir Walter Scott as well, obviously you can see the family library here.

CS: I'm getting a wonderful picture of a real family atmosphere in here.

The paintings behind are of the young couple when they were first married, or a few years later.

It's actually quite nice to see that picture of him in early life, because when we think of Darwin, we always associate the picture that we know from later life when he was a lot bigger and he's got a hat, or you know, the picture that's on the back of the £10 note with the big... With the beard.

VO: Darwin is known most famously for writing The Origin of Species, but the bulk of his work was as a botanist, and he spent every day in the garden and greenhouses observing plants.

Head gardener Rowan Blaik continues his work today.

This is really quite something.

Is this an original greenhouse, that was built...

It is, yeah.

..for Darwin?

Yes, yeah.

We're in his...

The oldest section of the greenhouse, and then he gradually added more and more sections on.

VO: Darwin used his greenhouse to carry out various experiments in his quest to understand the natural world.

This plant, Venus' flytrap.

He wanted to find how little force was needed to touch the hairs and make the trap shut.

Emma Darwin, his wife, had very, very fine hair.

VO: Darwin cut the tiniest piece of Emma's hair possible and inserted it into the Venus' flytrap.

When it closed, he realized that it wasn't the weight triggering the plant - it was the nutrients in the hair itself.

ROWAN: He didn't just write about diversity in The Origin Of Species, he also wrote very, very good books on plant science.

He wrote about how carnivorous plants work, he wrote about how climbing plants work.

This plant, for example, he saw how it was growing up a piece of rope in the greenhouse, and he said, "Isn't that interesting how it's rooting into the rope".

It's from South America, he wrote to Asa Gray, the botanist to speak to about South America, and he said, "Does it grow up the mossy bark of trees, "and it roots into it and then the leaves are round on the sunny side?"

And they said, "Well, yes, it does - "how did you know about its environment it's growing in?"

And he said, "I've got it growing up a piece of rope "and I've been observing how it's rooted into "that piece of rope."

It's fascinating, cuz when we think of Darwin, we're sometimes quite narrow minded, and tend to think of the Origins Of The Species, but actually what went on here, all the research, was a huge part of his life.

ROWAN: Yeah.

VO: Charles Darwin changed the way we viewed the world due to his careful observations of the natural behavior around him.

What a fascinating visit for Catherine!

While she learns about natural selection, the Charlie Ross specie is traveling to the village of Otford.

He's struggling to survive in a competitive jungle, with only £3.98 to spend in his last shop of this leg.

CS: Hello, sir.

JOE: Hello there.

Charlie.

How are you?

Alright?

Pleased to meet you.

CR: Your name is...?

JOE: Joe.

Joe, and you're in control are you, here?

Well, I try to be.

You've got a lot of people in here, have you, with things?

Yeah, there's 26 different dealers.

26 different dealers?

Do you mind if I go and have a look?

You can look round.

We've got an upstairs as well.

You do know my budget is s-severely limited.

Well, we'll see.

I've got £2.98.

Oh dear!

It's hopeless.

Never mind.

You'll have to find something at the right price.

I will find something.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Oh, I do feel an idiot, shopping with £2.98.

VO: Ah-ah-ah.

Actually Charlie, you have £3.98, but who's counting?

Not me.

Oh I say, there's something I'd buy.

Oh, surprise, surprise, not within my price range.

It's never-ending, this shop.

CR: Hello.

I'm Charlie.

ELAINE: Hello.

Oh, how nice to meet you.

Nice to see you.

Yes, nice to see you too.

What's your name, my dear?

My name's Elaine.

Elaine.

Is this your...

It is, yes.

It's wonderful, everywhere I go everyone seems to be manning their own department.

I'll tell you straight up.

Mm-hm.

I've been shopping for two days, and I have got left £2.98.

Oh my goodness.

VO: I'm not saying anything.

Is there anything there you could recommend?

ELAINE: For £2.98?

CR: That I could have for £2.98.

How about this?

I can see several things there, but I don't think you're going to be... Look, this is quite unusual, do you know what that is?

CR: Curling!

ELAINE: Yes.

CR: It's a curling stone.

ELAINE: It's a curling stone.

Well, it's not really a curling stone.

Well, it did have whisky in it at one time, but I'm afraid the whisky is gone now.

It's a whisky...!

Have you ever curled?

Yes, I have, a long time ago.

Have you?

Yes, I did, in the Highlands of Scotland, yes.

Oh, these are heavy, aren't they?

Very heavy.

But great fun.

But this one's not heavy.

No.

This one would make you feel very light headed if you drank the contents!

(THEY CHUCKLE) Peter Thomson of Perth.

How fantastic.

Does that say Gleneagles?

Scotch whisky.

There you go.

So that's a very good Scotch.

What a wonderful Scotch decanter.

This can't be in my price range though, can it?

If you talk to me very nicely, I might be able to do you a deal.

I can talk so sweetly!

Very sweetly.

You wouldn't believe it.

OK, what...?

CR: £2.98 is what I have.

ELAINE: Ooh, £2.98!

Do you know, I'm going to let you have a go with it.

Let's see if you can make a profit with it.

Oh, look!

VO: Charlie, you're blessed to have met the lovely Elaine.

CR: Time and time again... ELAINE: £2.98.

..cuz it's all I've got.

That will help the holiday fund to Acapulco.

It won't get you to Acapulco!

VO: So that's our experts' shopping all done and dusted and now it's that moment when they have to reveal all to each other.

CR: What a lovely place to be, in a leafy glade with a green Miss Southon.

CS: (LAUGHS) Green and navy.

This is lovely.

This looks worryingly familiar, Charlie.

I'm afraid there is something there, Catherine, that you will probably recognize.

Oh!

Ah, oh no, it is not all, it's not all bad news.

Not all bad news... VO: And there's another thing Catherine will recognize.

Very nice.

I am instantly drawn to that.

CR: Are you?

CS: I saw that in Lewes.

CR: Yeah.

CS: I love it.

It's lovely.

It's got one little nick on it.

Oh, has it?

I think they dated it a little earlier than it is.

I mean, they said 1900 on the ticket.

I think it's about 1920.

It's '20, isn't it?

Yes, it is.

I think they were a little optimistic there.

But that of course we needn't talk about, because you'll hate it.

No, I'm not even gonna bother going there.

CS: I love that, by the way.

CR: I bought my salting trough.

I thought on a nice big house, on a kitchen table or dining table, with fruit in it.

Beautiful.

Do you think a nice thing?

Yeah, really, really great idea.

£15.

That's very good.

And what's the curling stone?

It is... a whisky decanter.

CS: Oh, that's fabulous.

CR: Isn't it super?

It could make an inkwell, couldn't it?

Do you know how much it was?

CS: No.

CR: £2.98.

Well, you told me to spend most of my money on one thing...

I did, so you've gambled it on that.

And I...

It's gonna be really interesting to see what that makes.

If that goes over £100, I shall be standing in the saleroom crying my eyes out.

VO: No wallowing now, Catherine.

Time to move on.

CR: Ms Southon!

Oh, it's a hippo.

I got the glass hippo, but it's by Kosta Boda.

Oh, it's really nice.

What date is it?

It's only about 1970, it's not that old.

I don't think it's gonna make big bucks.

What do you think about this?

I've got to show you this.

That's fabulous.

Is that George III?

Beautiful.

No, it's not.

It is Victorian, it's 1894.

Is it?

Is it?

But isn't it just so elegant?

It is the most gorgeous, gorgeous shape.

Surely it is worth £100, is it not?

Well, I would like to think so.

I paid 55 for it.

VO: Yes, she's done it again.

This of course you bought simply because you did so well with the last ones?

No, but I bought it actually simply because it's got Rubens' cherubs on, Rubens' Angels, and I thought that was quite a nice little tough.

It is a nice thing.

What did it cost?

20.

CR: 20?

CS: Hm.

You've bought well again, haven't you?

No wonder I'm losing this competition!

But I bought that purely because of the cherubs.

I'm not sure I want to look in there, do I?

Go on.

It's a set of coffee spoons.

No!

Are they silver?

CS: Sterling silver.

CR: Yeah.

Although the enamel is perfect, CS: they are quite naively... CR: It's poor quality.

No!

They're quite naively painted.

Poor quality.

VO: Ouch!

CR: I really love them.

Reminds me of France.

What would you pay for them?

French cockerel.

What would I pay for them?

Er...

I would pay five, 10, 15, 20, 25, 30, 35, 40... (MUTTERS) No, stop doing this.

I'd pay... £50 for them.

Oh.

CR: What did you pay for them?

CS: 40.

What do you mean, "uh"?

50's more than 40.

Yeah, I know, but it would just be nice if you'd said a little bit more than that.

Sorry, I'd pay about 120.

Yeah, that's about right, thanks Charlie.

CR: That good?

CS: Always been my friend.

You've done really well with your money.

Good luck, Charlie.

Mwah!

You've done really, really well again.

And you've done well too.

VO: Very cordial - but what do they really think?

Catherine's done it again, she's bought really, really well.

Her oil bottle is delicious and will double the money.

I have to say, when I first saw it, I thought it was late 18th century.

It's late Victorian, but nevertheless, it's wonderful.

He surprised me with that clock.

I know he's had a sneaky look at it when we were in Lewes, and I looked at it as well, but I absolutely loved it, I thought it was a beautiful thing, it's very vibrant.

The one concern I have about it is the little bit of damage to the enamel.

Personally, I think that's gonna put off a lot of potential buyers.

VO: Charlie and Catherine kicked off this leg in Lewes, East Sussex and traveled steadily north, winding their way through Kent.

Their destination for today's auction is in Chiswick, west London.

Oh!

CS: # I got a good feeling... # CR: Have you?

CS: # About today.

# Yeah, I don't know why.

I'm not surprised - you've got such lovely things.

CS: It all hinges on the clock, though, doesn't it?

Have you seen the estimate on the clock?

It's a little...

Yet again, it is a mere fraction of what I paid.

It's just because of the chip.

I'm good at chips.

Close the door, come on.

CS: THAT'S got a chip on it now.

VO: Chiswick Auctions is our theater of dreams today - a buzzing saleroom full of gorgeous collectables.

So does hirsute auctioneer Tom Keane think our experts have chosen wisely?

The cocktail sticks might do alright, they're silver.

The little art-deco clock's OK, but what's it worth?

30, 40 quid?

50 quid on a good day?

So I'm not confident.

I really feel like a man walking towards the gallows, walking towards the rostrum today.

VO: Catherine started this leg with £172.20 and spent £150 on four auction lots.

Charlie kicked off with £101.98, and managed to mess up his figures again.

He thinks he spent every penny - also on four auction lots - but in fact he has £1 left over.

Good luck you two - you need to do well today.

Look, when you haven't got much money to spend... ..you buy what you can.

You do.

You told me to buy something expensive - I did.

And it's gonna blow up in my face.

VO: You don't know that, Charlie.

Look sharp - it's Catherine's crystal hippopotamus up first.

£20 for it.

I'm bid at 20, give me 22, at £20... CR: Straight in at 20 quid.

30, 32, 35.

The bid's at 32, give me 35, £32, is that it?

At £32 and going, at £32 you are.

TOM: At £32 and gone.

(GAVEL) VO: Oh dear, it did cost a lotta - and that's an even bigger loss after the auction house takes its well-earned commission.

Didn't lose much.

VO: Now, Charlie has one hit and one miss with his ale purchases.

How will this one fare?

£5.

CS: (SNIGGERS) Oh, is that a bid?

You don't even drink, Tony.

He's feeling sorry for him.

I'm bid at £5, at five, give me six, at £5 bid, at £5, give me six for it, £5.

All the excitement's over, I'm afraid.

VO: You did well there Charlie, well done!

It's a profit.

It's a profit.

VO: Catherine's Victorian carafe is up next.

Right Ms Southon, I'm with you all the way, hon.

Not a bad lot, £100 for it.

£100, £50 for it.

Not bad, not bad.

At £50, at £50, say 55, £50, take five bid there at £50, take five, 50 bid there at £50, 55, do you want 60?

Five, 70?

Can't sell this for £70.

At £70, at £70, all done at £70, going to at £70... Come on, you've got 100-200.

TOM: Disappointing, but... (GAVEL) VO: But that is a profit!

Cheer up you two!

If I were you, I would be well, well upset.

It's just one of those things, isn't it?

You're taking it jolly well.

That was my only hope!

VO: They both clearly hoped for a lot more.

Oh well, onwards and upwards Charlie's whisky decanter.

£20 for it.

£10 for it.

CR: Gleneagles!

TOM: 10 I'm bid, at 10.

12, I'm bid, at 12.

14, 16, at £14 your bid at 14, give me 16, 16 bid, you want 18?

A bid there at 16, give me 18, at £16, all done at 16...

Here we go, here we go.

From the Scotchman.

Do you want 20?

I'm getting excited.

At £18, all done at £18, got to go.

At £18 and done, at £18 the bid there.

VO: Charlie's on a roll - that is a decent profit!

I tell you what, I'm not buying antiques any more, I'm not buying classic antiques, I'm buying tat.

(THEY LAUGH) VO: It's Catherine's cocktail sticks next.

£30?

£30 for the lot, at £30, £30, give me 32, at £30, give me 32.

CS: Sh!

TOM: 32 there.

35.

35.

38.

40.

42.

45.

48.

TOM: 50... two.

CR: Oh!

55.

58.

Bid's there at 55, give me 58.

£55, all told at £55, done and going all done.

At £55, your last chance and gone.

VO: Stick it to me!

That's a great profit!

Not enough to please Catherine though.

I'm walking through treacle.

You've made about £6.

VO: It's Charlie's art-deco timepiece now - the one Catherine wanted to buy.

£50 for it.

Should make more.

£30 for it.

Bid at £30, give me 32, at 32, 35, 58, 40.

42.

45.

48.

50.

55.

60... five.

TOM: 70.

CR: Good.

Bid there at 65, give me 70 for it, 65 who else wants in?

Come on.

All done at £65.

Going back to America isn't it?

Yes?

VO: Sadly, that's a loss for Charlie.

When it started rattling along... CS: I know.

CR: ..I really thought it'd make 100, it was positive bidding.

I know.

VO: It's Catherine's last item - her silver-topped jar.

Start me £20 for it, here we go.

£20 for it, thank you, £20... Bid at 20.

£20, two.

25 there.

28 there.

Look, it's coming all over the place.

32.

35.

38.

40.

Fantastic.

£38 bid, at £38, give me 40, at £38.

TOM: 40.

42.

CR: Well done.

TOM: Right at the back at £40.

CS: £40.

42, at £40.

42 at £40.

Double your money.

At £40 and going, your last chance at £40, it's gone.

VO: That's an excellent profit for Catherine, putting her firmly in the lead.

Well done.

Finished with a bang.

# Double your money... # Try and get rich.

# VO: It all hangs on Charlie's trough now.

He needs a decent profit to catch Catherine up.

£30 for it.

£20 for it.

Bid at £20, £20, give me 22.

At £20, give me 22.

25.

28.

30.

32.

35.

35 bid, 38.

40.

42.

45.

48.

CR: That's better.

TOM: At 45, give me 48, at £45.

At £45, going out at 45, that's the money, 45 and gone.

VO: That's another good profit for Charlie.

But is it enough to overtake his competitor?

CS: ..done.

CR: Very happy with that.

Charlie, that's amazing.

What do you mean, amazing?

CS: No... CR: 45 quid!

Cost 15, made 45.

Come on.

Ooh!

VO: So, Charlie started this leg with £101.98 and has made a profit of £8.08 after auction costs.

That leaves him with a slightly inflated £110.06 to carry forward.

But Catherine has edged ahead yet again, and began this leg with £172.20 and made a profit of £11.54, beating Charlie by just over £3!

That leaves her with a grand total of £183.74 to spend next time.

Ooh-ar.

The sun is shining, Charlie.

And I made a profit.

About £8.

What did you make?

I made 11, but never mind.

One auction to go.

You wouldn't believe it, but I can still catch you.

Have you got your swimming costume?

CS: No.

CR: Let's go to the seaside.

VO: Next time on the Antiques Road Trip: Catherine confuses a dealer into a bargain.

40 for the two.

And you're gonna hit me with...

I wasn't really going to hit you with anything, CS: but as you've asked!

DEALER: That's alright then.

VO: And Charlie comes over all continental.

May I do it the French way?

Mwah!

Mwah!

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