I am your host, AShira Nelson, and this is PBS Western Reserve Forum 360, where we have a global outlook from a local view.

My guest today, I'm interviewing Tiffany Becton, a multifaceted mother of four, a grandmother or “Nana”, as she would say, a business owner of Honeypot Doula.

She was born and raised in Akron, Ohio.

Tiffany is a certified birth doula, a medical assistant, a birth advocate, the director and organizer of “Infant Maternal Vitality Walk.” She is also a licensed cosmetologist, herbalist, a meditation coach, and a travel agent.

Woo!

Tiffany plays no games.

With a passion for traveling and experiencing different cultures, Tiffany hopes to one day visit a birthing village in Africa.

Today we're going to dive into all things related to being a doula.

- Yes.

- Welcome, Tiffany.

- Thank you so much for having me - No problem.

Thank you for being here.

I really appreciate it.

This is a topic that I honestly want to learn more about - Yeah.

- and just educate the community I had recently heard that someone say that they didn't know midwives and doula were still around, and I knew I needed more information.

So I'm like, okay, let me find it a guest to - Right - educate us all.

So thank you for educating us today in this field - Yeah, absolutely.

Absolutely.

- So can you tell me a little bit about your journey and what inspired you to become a doula?

- So what inspired me to be a doula is my daughter's.

- I have 2 adult daughters - Okay who made me a Nana.

- Yes - According to the grandbabies.

- Yeah.

- And just helping them through the birth process, just watching everything very different from one another, very different from myself.

- Okay.

- And just seeing how the medical staff dealt with everything with them.

And it was just what they both said after their first birth was, “Mom, I wouldn't have been able to do this without you.” Like, you should really help other people and you know, offer it as like a service.

I'm like, “You really think, - Wow.

- someone would really want me in the room with them.

Like, birth is sacred.” - Yeah.

- Like birth is really spiritual So, you know, to have a total stranger, like, absolutely.

- You can really make a difference.

- Yes.

- That's incredible, okay.

So how did growing up in Akron influence your work as a doula or birth advocate?

- To be honest, I didn't even hear the term doula - Okay.

- When I was younger, That didn't come about until I got older.

- Okay.

And then I'm looking what everybody's like, - Yeah.

- We already doulas.

It’s a support person.

Like, that's what we do in our family.

Aunties, cousins, sisters all go up to the hospital and take rotation and comforting mom, watching out for her best interest.

We were already doing it.

- Didn't even know it - Didn’t even know that was like - Right.

- Wow.

So what led you to start the Honey Pot Doula, and what services do offer through your business?

- It was my daughter's that - Okay.

- kind of pushed me in that direction Like, I'm always a help.

Like, I always just want to help and make someone feel better.

So having gone through birth four times, I know what it takes to comfort a mom.

- Yep.

- And sometimes those things, she just don't know why she feels, - Man.

Thinking back to when I had my daughters.

- You’re right.

Exactly.

You just don't know sometimes.

- Yes.

- Sometimes you just want it quiet.

Just don't say anything.

So just everything that I did for my daughters, I wanted to provide that for these other young women - Okay.

- and women.

Of all ages.

At home, at the hospital.

Everything I did with my daughters before my grandchildren arrived, I offer for my moms.

- So let's dig into those things.

- Yeah.

- Talk about the experience.

Like, bring us into your world.

How does it feel?

What it look like?

How does this sound?

- It is amazing.

Like when I'm at the hospital, a lot of nurses come in.

They're like, “I wanna stay in your room.” Like it's just a whole different vibe is just a whole different energy - Okay.

- with the aromatherapy and the sound therapy, and just the massage is just bringing a whole different, you know, atmosphere to mom to kind of get her in that headspace.

- Okay.

- Because birth is mental.

- It is, it takes a lot.

- As well as physical.

- So, as a doula, do you count as one of the, you know, how sometimes you go to hospitals and, they’re like, “oh, you can only have two guests or three guests.” - Yes.

-Are you counted as one of those guests?

- No.

They expanded.

-Okay.

- They said that it was, Some hospitals are 2 or 3 family members plus your doula.

- Oh, okay.

- So we got our own little spot.

- Very nice.

Okay.

- Yeah.

- So how is it balancing the role of a mother, grandma, business owner and birth advocate?

- You know, some days I ask myself that same question.

- I'm like, I don't know.

take it day by day.

- I don’t know.

- What’s your trick?

- Aside from being super woman, my calendar.

- Okay.

- My schedule saves my life.

If it’s not in my calendar, It won't get done.

- Right.

It does not exist.

We never talk about it.

- I don't have no idea what you're talking about.

- Okay.

- But that definitely saves me.

- Okay, so for those who are unfamiliar, including myself, can you explain what a doula is and like the role it plays more deeply into the birthing process?

- So a birth doula, because there's many types of doulas.

- Okay.

- Yeah.

- Okay.

- So for a birth doula we are there.

Well, at least I try to get mom as early as possible in her pregnancy as possible to build that relationship, that rapport with them.

And then, you know, it's easier to go through the labor process.

They're mentally, physically, emotionally, informationally.

There's things that she may not know.

And, you know, she's feeling like she has to do, but that's not really the case.

- Okay.

- You do have a right to say what you don't want during your delivery.

So and not a lot of moms, - definitely don't feel like it's presented as options.

- No, no.

- Sometimes can come across that way.

- Yeah.

- Like we're going to do this - Right.

- And we're going to do that instead of, “do you mind if we do this?” And then the next step would be that.

- Okay.

you know, an informed decision.

- Right.

Okay.

So early on as possible and just building that relationship with your client.

- Yes.

- Okay.

- Absolutely - How is the support that the doula provides different from like the care given by midwives or doctors?

- So the care from the midwife and doctor is more obstetric.

It's like more medical.

- Oh okay.

- Yeah.

So the doula our scope of practice is non-medical when it comes to especially being in the hospitals.

- Okay.

- Okay?

When you go in the traditional route, it's a little different.

That's when we get into the herbal treatments and teas and things like that, which I do as well.

- Okay.

- But at the hospital, you know, we stay of course in our scope of practice.

We’re there mentally for them We're there to help them walk through if they're comfortable, if they're not being heard, their needs aren't being met.

We're making sure that we're that voice like, - Okay.

- “So, mom, is this what you want?

Do you really want your water broken now?” - Okay.

You know, “would you like to try - Yeah.

this first?” And it has to come from mom because I never want to like, speak for mom.

- Yeah.

- You know, it has to come directly from her.

I don't ever want to put myself in a position where I'm opposing the medical team, and then they kick me out or something.

- Okay.

- Which has never happened, by the way.

- I like that.

Again, You brought it back to giving your guests options, - Yes.

- because again, I never knew there was options.

- Yeah.

- And I'm sure a lot of parents can feel, or moms can feel the exact same way.

- Yup.

- You're not presented with this choice or this choice.

- Yeah.

- It’s just, well, “I think we should do this.” Or “We’re going to do this?” - Yeah, exactly.

- Like, well, sure.

“What was my other option?” - Yeah - You just kind of concluded to this.

- Yeah.

We just right here.

- My legs are open and then we go into something else like.

- Yup.

- My god.

- Exactly.

- Wow.

- Let me know what I can do first before we get to this.

- Yeah.

- So can you share a typical day for you as you are supporting a birth.

- So just depending on the time baby decides they wants to arrive, rather it’s at night, then I make arrangements for kids to be dropped off in the morning at school.

So, because I'm at the birth, until mom delivers, I don't leave.

If it's at the hospital.

Same deal.

Daytime, I'm just there, you know, give the birth plan to the medical staff.

So it just kind of doesn't leave room for confusion.

Like, you already know what she wants.

So you really - Yeah.

- shouldn't continue to ask if she wants the epidural if she says she wants to go natural.

- Okay.

- I want to go natural.

Do not ask if I want the epidural.

It’s right there.

- Oh, okay.

And do you help create the plan?

- I do.

During our consultation.

- Okay.

- We go through a whole birth plan.

What mom wants, what she doesn't want, different smells that she doesn't like, - Wow.

- you know, so we go through the whole thing.

So I give that to the staff.

- Okay.

- After just laying everything out, stay in contact.

We go through workout.

Sometimes we go to park, sometimes we curb walk.

We bounce on a ball, do some yoga.

So just kind of prepare mom for labor.

- Wow.

- Once we get to that point, rather we call the midwife to the house, or we’re going on to the hospital.

- Okay.

- So it just depends on what the patient is having going on.

- And in order to create a birthing plan, do you prefer moms to like, have an idea or do you just like, kind of help them come up with the plan?

- A lot of moms come in knowing exactly what they want.

but there are some where they're like, “I have no idea.” And so I'm just giving them ideas - Okay - and just tell them to look up some things and just kinda digging deeper to get to know them.

That's why we meet up - Okay.

- several times before we even make it to the delivery room.

I get to know their family, their spouses.

I meet moms and I have something called a “nesting party” for all my moms.

That's something that I did for my daughters before my grandbabies were born.

- Okay you’re going to tell us about that.

- I never heard of this.

place.

- We're boiling bottles and nipples.

We're getting a carpet cleaned, we're putting together furniture and unpacking all that baby shower stuff.

- Yes.

Oh, yeah, - Poppin’ tags and washing clothes.

- We get a lot of that.

- That is a nesting party.

And I provide, like a little fruit tray, little hors d'oeuvre.

And they invite people that want to actually - Actually help do the work.

- Yes, absolutely.

Because we’re gonna be working.

- Yeah, that's takes a lot of work and I just remember being in that moment like, “okay what do I do with all this - Yeah.

- Stuff?” - Yeah.

It can be overwhelming.

- And it's like, okay, I gotta find somewhere to put this stuff.

You need to wash this stuff.

- Yup.

- Am I supposed to wash?

- Yeah.

Is it okay for me to put the baby - In this stuff?

- There you go.

All questions.

- Like, oh my God.

Like overload.

- Absolutely - Overload.

- Absolutely.

So when you got that support team there, - Yeah.

- You know we can kind of like pour into mom.

Like - Okay.

There's a segment of the nesting party of where we would put in suggestions.

and we would let mom know.

Like one of my favorite is to tell mom sleep when the baby's sleeping.

- Oh, yeah.

That's one of my favorite ones.

- We all hear it.

But then it's like, “no really, you need to sleep.” - Literally sleep.

Don't run around the house cleaning.

- No.

I think that's the one piece of advice I just didn't listen to as much as I should’ve - Yeah.

I'm like, “no, but look at the dishes.” - Yeah, yeah.

- Look at the laundry, and the bottles, they’ve been sitting all day.

- Oh my God look like a dirty mom.

- Oh my God.

What if someone comes over and it's like oh my God.

- And then if someone does come over you know what they should be doing?

- Oh my God.

- Going to do those dishes.

- That’s true.

That's true.

I was even so bad because I'm a CPA.

I was so bad, and I was like, logging on to work.

And my job was like, “wait, I think I see you on like, do we have to disable your email?” Like, I should have just took advantage of that.

- Yup, yup.

- And relax.

- Absolutely.

- So what are some of the key differences between a birth doula and a postpartum doula?

- So one of the main differences is, the birth doula is there for the pregnancy and birth.

The postpartum doula is for aftercare.

- Oh.

- Yeah.

That's for after care for mom, for baby.

I've done some postnatal care aside from my daughter's, for clients.

And all mom literally needs is a little exhale.

- Okay.

- That's literally.

- She had a toddler, - Yeah.

- So I would help with bath time.

- Yeah.

- I tell mom.

“Okay, everybody's in bed, Go to bed.” - Yeah.

- Go to bed.

She's in the tub.

She's relaxing.

She's watching her TV shows, and she can go to sleep.

And when baby wake up, I'm there for the baby.

So I will stay until morning hours or whatever hours we decide or agree on.

Yeah.

So that's the difference.

- Very nice.

- They’re both needed.

- Very nice.

Hello.

This is Forum 360 where we have a global outlook from a local view.

I'm your host AShira Nelson.

And today my guest is Tiffany, And we are talking all things related to being a doula.

Okay, so to jump back in - Yes.

- Okay so we have a birth doula.

We have a postpartum doula.

- Yes.

- Are there any other types?

- There are.

- Okay.

- There's one in particular I wouldn’t hope to want to use.

- Yeah.

but not all pregnancies result in a live birth.

I'll just say that.

- Okay.

- So there are something called bereavement doulas.

Death doula.

And, they help mom through the process.

That's very mental.

So they are there to help the mom and the family.

- Yeah.

- Through the process.

- Okay.

Well, thanks for that education.

- Yeah.

- Okay, so why do you think having a doula is so important for expecting mothers, especially of women of color?

- Yeah, it's a very important thing to have.

A doula, whether she's a birth doula or not, A doula is a mom, a sister, a cousin, a best friend.

Someone who's gonna be there and look out for your best interests and say, “hey, she said that she didn't want this.” You know?

- Yeah.

- Just kind of have her back because she's in that zone.

- Oh, yeah.

- And trying to focus.

You know, she don't want to be sitting there trying to fight for her life.

So having somebody there to look out for you is important for women of color because sometimes we're looked at as a number, unfortunately.

- Yeah.

- It's really sad to say, even til today.

- Like, Why are we being treated like a number?

I’m a person.

- Yeah.

- You know what I'm saying?

I don't want it that way.

I don't like that.

I really want to go natural with this baby without any intervention.

- Right.

- You know, I don't want my water broke.

Yeah.

- Without you trying to convince me that this is the only option I have.

- You have to do it.

Yeah - Yeah.

So what are the emotional and physical benefits of having a doula during your labor and delivery?

- So if you're my doula client, - Okay.

- I will be heavily focused on your mental.

Getting you in a space, whether it's a certain tone you want to hear, you know, sound is very important.

So I love sound therapy.

I love listening to 528.

It's very calming.

And it really helps you to kind of come into your power.

- Okay.

- So getting your mental together, having a doula can direct you.

They're giving you affirmations.

They're building you up and giving you that strength and letting you know you're a woman, you know?

- Right.

- You're built for this.

Like you're strong.

You were given this job for a reason.

- And sometimes you need that reminder.

- Absolutely - You do, in that moment sometimes all you feel is the pain and remembering that - Yup.

- I’m built for this.

- That’s right.

- I created the plan.

I can do this.

- That's right.

- I can see so many benefits in that.

And I'm again, thinking back of my birth.

Oh my God, I could have had sound.

I could have had aroma therapy.

- Yes.

- Those are all the things that I love now.

- Absolutely.

- And it was like, “oh I missed out.” - Do you wanna do it over again?

- We’ll have to think about that a little more.

Again mentally, I don't know if I could do it.

- Oh my goodness.

- So how do you advocate for mothers during the hospital birthing or home birth?

We talked a little bit about it.

Are there any other ways other than, like just speaking up for them or I know that is such an important part.

- It is.

- But can you tell me about that a little more?

- Just mainly just reiterating what mom already stated.

You know, maybe not even in a firm manner, but just kind of - Yeah.

- letting them know Like, “she really said she wanted to go natural.” - Okay.

- That direct, stern - Yeah.

- You know, posture to just let them know you know “this is not what she wants.

We're here to give her the birth that she wants.

Don't you want that for her?

Not just making it easy for you and your time?” - Yeah.

- Let's make this woman remember this in a good way.

- Because I'm thinking back, where someone in my birthroom said “it's getting late.

So do you want pitocin to speed things up?” - Wow.

- And it was just because it was getting late.

- Okay.

“ We need this bed.” - And I was thinking later.

Yeah, like, “wait, so if I would, I just came like this happened during the day.” - Yeah.

- And don't get me wrong, my pregnancies, they all went so fast.

- That's good.

That's really good.

- But again because it was some added things.

- Yeah.

- Like I always have with pitocin given to me.

to like.

- Each one, huh?

- Yeah.

And you know what, after the first one, Then I got it done for the second, I thought it was normal.

Again, there was no options.

- Yeah.

“This is the process.” - Nobody presented it.

Yeah.

So baby one, by baby two I didn't even question it.

-Wow.

- I'm just like, “oh, this is my options.” - Wow, yeah.

- “Okay, we should speed things up?

Okay.” And I had both of my daughters, like in the middle of the night.

So I just assume that they're at work.

They're not trying to rush me out the next morning.

But, - “This is what I'm supposed to be doing.” - Yes.

- If you don't know, you don't know it.

- That's very true.

That's why these conversations are so important.

- Very.

- So can you share a memorable experience where you felt your role as a doula made a significant impact on a mother or family?

- Oh yeah.

Definitely.

I would have to say my sister in law.

- Okay.

- She was in labor with my niece.

This is the first baby and I don't know what was going on at the hospital, but my brother called me and I heard it in his voice.

He was like, “T, I need you to get up here now.” I’m like, “What's going on?” - Right.

- He’s like “I don't really know She's crying, she's uncomfortable, No one's helping her.” “Oh, okay.

Let me hurry up and get up here.” So I get up there and I see where she's at.

She's flat on her back.

She's like, “this pain is in my back.” And I'm like, “okay, we got to get you turned.” - Yeah.

- Okay?

And so I get to the nurse station and everyone's just chit-chat, chit-chat.

- Yeah.

- And I was like, “okay, so we're going to need some help over in room 23.

You know, mom is in pain.

We need to get, you know, her together.” Blood pressure was up.

My niece’s heart rate was dropping.

So they get it turned over and get her in position, and she's crying, and we're doing pressure points and counter pressure is what it is.

For all of that back labor, I'm doing some movements with her legs in case baby's hitting the bone and she's uncomfortable.

That can cause a lot of pain.

And I asked, I said, ”Can I pray for you?” And just by bringing the calm.

- Yeah.

- And everything to her.

Her blood pressure started going back to normal.

Savannah's heart rate started coming back up, and she was able to deliver within the hour.

- Wow.

- Within the hour.

- Wow.

- Yeah, vaginal delivery.

- Incredible.

- No extra intervention.

- Wow.

So what changes would you make?

Shifting gears a little, but what changes would you like to see in the health care system when it comes to a maternal care?

- Well, one thing I can say is a lot of things have been improving.

- Okay.

- They are recognizing doulas.

They are understanding our position and our role.

and how much is needed.

It’s not oh, just like a thing now.

“Oh it’s just a thing I had a birth doula.” No, we're actually needed.

- Yeah.

- You know, rather like I said, once again, certified or not, which in the state of Ohio, you do not need a certification.

I want people to know that.

- Okay.

- I knew that prior to even getting certification, I just got it to have that education.

Am I missing anything?

So just having that you know, that's an option to have a doula is important.

So they are really recognizing us to where we're able to bill.

- Okay.

- We’re actually able to be on Medicaid.

Yes, clients with with Medicaid, different colors, - Very nice.

- Buckeye.

Yeah.

- Very nice.

- Yeah.

- That's so important because, I mean, the price the overall cost of things.

- Yeah.

- Are so very important.

And I was going to ask like, is it private pay only?

And so I'm really glad you touched on that.

- Yeah, absolutely.

- Because the cost of things really make a difference in your care.

- It does.

So I'm just so thankful to hear you say that baby is covered.

So what advice would you give an expecting mother who feel they aren't being listened to, or respected by their health care provider?

- If there's a mom who is not comfortable, with her provider, rather it be a midwife or OB, you can always switch.

- Okay.

- You can leave the doctor.

- You can, you have options - You can go.

You have options.

- You have options.

- Don’t feel like Because this is who mom went to, - Yeah.

- This is who sister went to, you have to stay.

Or this is who delivered your other child.

Things may have changed.

- Yeah.

- Things have changed.

And if you're not being heard and you feel like it's a tug of war, what do you think it's going to be like day of delivery?

You don't want that.

You don't want the energy.

- Good point.

So can you share some of the common misconceptions people have about a doula in their work?

- Let’s see, - Or do you feel like it's any?

- I know, when I first started, I'll say on paper, three years ago, it was a lot of people, like, trying to downplay.

- Yeah.

- like the work that we do, like it’s just a something to do.

This is not something you just decide to do and you want to do for fun.

- Yeah, because none of us have extra free time.

- Yeah.

- In her day.

- You're getting calls in the middle of the night.

- Wow.

- Different types of weather, you know, and you need your focus.

Your only focus is getting there to mom.

Making sure that her and baby's okay.

Or should we meet straight at the hospital?

What's going on?

- Okay.

- Like this is not something you just do as a something to do.

- As a hobby.

- You gotta literally have a heart for this.

- Okay.

- Yeah.

- So how do you continue to grow and learn, in your role as a doula?

- Just the more clients I take, the more I learn.

- Okay.

- And also just getting into new classes.

- Just meeting up with, connecting with other birth workers.

- Yeah.

- I work with a home birth midwife, who actually has a fourth trimester program that's out now, just to let you all know, there's a program called “Fourth Trimester”.

and it is Jasmine Wagster.

- Okay.

- Just to put that out there.

She’s a traditional, home birth midwife.

And so just surrounding yourself with people like that, you're going to naturally learn.

- Okay.

- Yeah.

- So what are your future goals for Honey Pot Doula?

And how do you hope to impact more families moving forward?

- Oh man.

The future of The Honey Pot Doula I have so many dreams and thoughts.

I just want to be able to provide a safe space for my moms.

I mean, I know I’m the safe space here, but I want like a physical brick and mortar where they can actually come in and we can meditate together, and we can just, you know, go over their birth plan in the actual building, and they can shop whatever herbs - Yeah.

- You know, things that they need.

So that is where The Honey Pot is headed.

- Okay.

And lastly, what advice do you have for someone who's interested in becoming a doula?

- If you are interested in becoming a doula, I would say do some research.

Just check out the different schools.

I personally went through International Doula Institute.

- Okay.

- And they were amazing.

You can go at your own pace.

It was some of it online.

There was some hands on.

You had to, of course, meet up.

You had to complete your births and things like that.

But yeah, just look up.

Don't go with just “Oh, everyone's going to this particular place.” Look at the curriculum.

- Okay.

Go through what you're gonna get in the end and what they help you with.

- Okay.

Well, thank you.

- You’re welcome.

- And I'm your host AShira Nelson And this is Forum 360.

Thank you for watching, and see you all soon.

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